Learning to Walk Away

It is so easy to get caught up in a heated argument and say things you wished weren’t said later.  I have a good desire of taking the higher road in a conversation, monitoring my responses to fit my intentions, and show a loving heart in spite of what the other person says.  It doesn’t always turn out that way.

I get hooked into defending an accusation, or trying to explain my reasons behind an action of mine.  I think if I can only get the other person to see what I really meant, they would see that I am a good person, and wouldn’t want to offend.  Many times after a heated discussion, I come away feeling like I proved their point (or at least didn’t disprove their contention) and felt like a small child for allowing myself to get drawn into the emotions of the tussle.

I was speaking with a long-time friend of mine today, and she was telling how she got drawn into a heated argument with her son.  He spoke words that broke her heart.  I reminded her that he wasn’t able to think carefully about what he has said in the past, and asked her why she didn’t just end the conversation.  But I knew why.  We want so badly to bring loved ones into our understanding, and to support us in things that are dear to us.

We would be wise to know they may never do that, or have the capability to do so.  Then it is up to us to take control of ourselves, and walk away.  It is a realization that it’s not worth the conflict, and most likely we cannot change their minds.  Walking away also gives opportunity to stay in harmony with those we can love, but not change or try to fix.