Snorting Salt Water

My oxymoron today is that I’m a lady, and I snort salt water.  I know that doesn’t look or sound very refined, much less ladylike.  But I believe in taking care of my nose and throat.  You see, I get around some pretty yucky air pollutants.  Yesterday, I was sanding around the edges of a solid-wood dining room floor, getting it ready for the drum sander to get the main areas in the center of the room.  My son and I could have hired this done, but it was cost prohibitive on our budget for this rent house.  Besides, it keeps me from being a couch potato.

I looked up and saw fine particles of dust floating in the beam of sunlight coming through the windows.  I didn’t have my mask on (I dislike them) as it didn’t appear to be too bad.  So when I got home I performed the noes ritual I learned from a doctor.

I remember how surprised I felt as he said he was going to show me how to keep from being sick all the time–something he practiced regularly.  Then he lays across one of those round rolling stools most doctors have in their examination rooms on his stomach with his feet and head dangling on both sides of the stool.  He turns his head sideways, and places a finger on the upper side of his noose, and proceeds to pretend breath salt water from a cup up the lower nostril.  He turns his head and repeats the reverse action on the lower portion of that nostril.  “Do it a few times and don’t use too much salt,” he instructs.  “You can do it everyday in the cold season, and you will have far fewer sick days.”  And, no, he didn’t look very dignified laying across that stool.

Since then, I have heard other health professional say the same thing.  And when I faithfully snort, my head stays open and free from infection.  Is this a skill I would want on my resume?  Not really, but how about innovative or problem-solving?  Sure, why not.

My family thinks I am little nuts at some of the things I come up with, but my husband asked me recently how to do the “salt-water snort.”  I guess he was interested in keeping a clear head, but I think he may be too much of a sissy to actually do it.  He thinks water is for drinking and bathing.